Amazing Race week five post game

It’s week five of the Amazing Race and teams are making like Dick Cheney and are bused to an undisclosed location which will cause teams to break some bread and then act like doughboys. The Detectives have set their sights on eliminating a team. We find out that not even World War I conditions will cause Brandy to shut up and stop complaining or making make fun of Beauty Queen Caite. One team is doesn’t know their directions that causes them to miss a clue. Last place Team Big Brother must overcome a speed bump and instead is going in circles and might be due for eviction but a blind U-turn may spell out the end in for one team in Morse code.

This year’s Amazing Race continues to try to keep teams off balance, this time by having teams all board a bus after arriving at the pit stop on the last leg and traveling in an undisclosed location and then forcing them to determine where they are to continue the race. On the bus Joe tells us that his leg is hurting badly but he still think thinks he is better on one leg than all of the other teams and is not worried about any of them. This does not set well with The Detectives Michael and Louie who has a newfound confidence after a first place finish last leg and now have Joe and Heidi in their crosshairs. Teams arrive in France and the Detectives are the first to leave at 9:35 am and are instructed to drive themselves to the town of Ste Menehould France and find a local bakery and buy a fresh baguette to receive their next clue. What teams don’t know is that the next clue is hidden inside the baguette. The Detectives’ luck from last leg continues as they spot a postal worker delivering mail and ask him for directions to the bakery, who knows the streets in the area better than a postal worker?

The Father Daughter team of Steve and Ally depart in second along with Joe and Heidi in third place. There is a discussion between father and daughter about what a baguette is. While daughter Ally knows, we are not sure Steve does although he assures his daughter he does after she answers correctly. Cowboys Jet and Cord aren’t sure where they are as they depart nor do they seem to know what a baguette is either thinking it is a pastry of some sort. Most of the team depart and have no trouble finding the bakery except for last place Team Big Brother. Jordan is driving and can’t seem to find her way out of the start town and gets lost and confused with the many circles in the town putting them even further behind. It does not look good for the pair with an unknown speed bump ahead. I will say the teams appear to be starved from their bus trip since every team takes advantage of bread and hungrily munches the bread down on their way to the next stop.

Louie and Michael are the first to arrive at the bakery shop and determine that the clue is inside the bread by luckily breaking it open while talking to the baker. Teams must now drive themselves to Le Main Des Massiges where they will find themselves at the detour and have to pick between “in the trenches” or “under fire”. The hill that teams arrive at was the scene of intense fighting between the Germans and the French during World War I. The Detectives open the clue first and are instructed by the detour to dress as American doughboys and pick their own mission. In the trenches involves teams going down through the historical trenches and navigating to a messaging area and putting on headphones to receives a Morse codes message that they must decode using only a only field manual. In under fire, teams must crawl on their bellies under barbed wire 100 yards while being shot at by period airplanes and dodging nearby explosions until they reach the machine gun nest where a French soldier will give them a message and then crawl back to safety under the barbed wire. In both case teams must tie their message to a homing pigeon that will deliver the message that the war is over and receive their next clue. Louie and Michael make the choice most teams will make of under fire and make the crawl across the battlefield fearing the Morse code portion. Teams are warned caution there is a U-turn ahead as Steve and Ally arrive along with Joe and Heidi. Both choose under fire as Joe tells us despite the bad leg he can make the crawl.

Louie and Michael are the first to finishes the task and are instructed by the clue to just head south down the road where they find the blind U-Turn. Teams can cause another team to go back and complete the other part of detour before advancing. There is some discussion between the two on whom to U-Turn and Steve and Ally are mentioned but both detectives still remember Joe bragging on the bus and they decide to teach him a lesson by using the U-turn on Joe and Heidi. Louie and Michael are told to march themselves into town and find a church to receive their next clue.

As other teams arrives the Cowboys Jet and Cord are able to your their speed and strength to power past the physically weaker teams of the Brothers and the Lesbians into fourth place. Brandy insists that their team is making the wrong choice and should be doing the Morse codes portion instead. She will constantly complain throughout the crawl and won’t shut up despite bombs going off and bullets flying. She even goes so far to say that crawling is for stupid people and Morse code is for smart people and further insults Caite call her stupid when they pass them on way back with their clue. The mutual dislike of both teams is apparent as they hurl insults at each other under machine gun fire. I’m not sure anyone could put up with Brandy; she is constant pain in the ass with her complaining. I keep hoping they will get eliminated but so many of teams seem to be lacking mentally, I predict we may be stuck with Brandy and her bitching for the rest of the race.

Steve and Ally have finished and reached the U-turn to discover their allies Joe and Heidi have been U-turned and break the bad news to the team as they approach. Joe is mystified as to why he has been U-turned and obviously doesn’t remember the bragging on the bus. They must now attempt the Morse code section, which Brandy so desperately wanted to try. This will prove almost impossible as the pair tries in vain to listen to the quick dots and dashes of the code. They will make several attempts to solve it but are incorrect on each try because the message is worded differently about the end of the war

Meanwhile first place team of Louie and Michael have found the next clue at the church and are told to change into traditional Tour de France biking outfits circa 1903 and pedal 100 year old bicycles to the pit stop. Louie and Michael finish first and Phil declares them the team to beat after winning two straight legs but I am doubtful since I think they are lacking the smarts to bring home victory. Steve and Ally finish second and are still a team to watch out for as far as I am concerned. The Cowboys are also a dangerous team and move up to third with the Brothers and the Lesbians following.

Brent and Caite have completed the crawl and misread the clue heading in the direction south instead of south down the road causing them to miss the clue at the u-turn. They somehow stumble upon the church and the bicycle clue and happily bike their way to the pit stop to be team number six. Phil has bad news for them. Instead of getting what I think will be a time penalty, they are told they can not check in until they find the missing clue before the bikes and bring it back to him. By this time team Big Brother has finally arrived at the battlefield and must do their speed bump, they are told to go into the trenches and build a wall made of branches to a certain height. Heidi and Joe still can’t figure out the Morse code and it is a race between these three teams for elimination.

Brent and Caite are able to backtrack and find the U-turn box and then race to get back to Phil while Jeff and Jordan complete the wall and start their crawl. Brent and Caite are surprised to find out that they are still team number six back at the pit stop. It is down to Joe and Heidi and Jeff and Jordan but the Morse code proves to be too much for Joe and Heidi and they give up. This allows team Big Brother to survive another leg as Phil comes to the battlefield to tell the married couple all other teams have checked in and they are eliminated. The Detectives have gotten their wish and eliminated one of the smarter teams. Some of the younger teams, which should be stronger physically such as Jeff and Jordan and Brent and Caite, seem to be lacking smarts. If I were to guess right now I would say the final 4 would likely be Steve and Ally, Carol and Brandy, Jet and Cord and possibly the Detectives. Then again this is the Amazing race and anything can happen and you are always one bad cab ride away from your doom. Things are not looking good for Brent and Caite in next week’s preview, we may be saying farewell to good-looking duo.