Kill Lady Blackhawk

It's just three little words. They really shouldn't affect me the way they did.
Three Words is all it took to enrage me. Frustrate me. Break my heart,
and generally depress me more than I am already. Three words. Why?
Allow me to explain.

So after another throughly shitty day of unemployment and more dead end leads,
I finally get to new comic book day. Yea!. For the uninitiated among you,
Wednesday is day when new comics come in and all of us comic book junkies get our weekly fix.
And yes, it is like unto an addiction. Those of you who don't read comics will never know
the sheer joy of the ride to the comic book store is on Wednesday.

Upon arriving at the store I find it to be a "light week". Only four new
comics this week, damn. But okay, I'm still unemployed.
Heading home I find myself back on the couch trying to decide
which to read first. I decide Buffy which I think will be the best read,
but turns out to be a little lacking this month. Go figure.

As I finish reading the next selection from DC comics this
month, I get to the back book that contains the monthly DC Nation
column. This consists of news and teaser of what's coming up
to get the junkie...er reader excited about what's coming up or their next fix.

They have been doing some bit about time travel
the last month, to explain how they know about things
we don't yet. And how hard it is to keep straight what we can
and cannot know yet. Anyway, it's lame but it's a premise
to write a column, one which they have chose to continue this month.

I get to the part, where they have "uncovered" someone's to do
list for the coming months. They are time travelers, you know
and they have secret knowledge. I start to read each entry like
the good little addict that I am. And there it is.

"Kill Lady Blackhawk."

Motherfucker.

No, you've got to be kidding me. You can't.

Shock quickly turns to acceptance.

Aw fuck, all that work that writer Gail Simone did to make her an interesting fun character in
recently cancelled Birds of Prey comic, all flushed down the drain with 3 words.

Shit. Dan Didio (DC's executive editor), you're an ass. It's bad enough you
okayed James Robinson's (a great writer who should known better) recent JLA script.
Which implied that Lady Blackhawk. This smart, gutsy, shoot from the
hip, kind of girl friday had been a total brainless bimbo and had a drunken
threesome with Hal Jordan, current Green Lantern and the Huntress
who was also the co-star of The Birds of Prey comic.

Never mind the fact that this made no sense from the readers standpoint, and aggravated
a good portion of their female audience. Never mind it went against years of Gail's continuity,
but I guess all good looking, ass kicking women who are best friends turn into raging
lesbians and whores after few drops of booze? Right boys? It's a porno staple, so it must be true.

Now this. Kill Lady Blackhawk.

The thing is, in the last three to five years, the trip to the comic book store is more like
a trip to the morgue. Well, let's see if we can identify this weeks' body, shall we? Hmm...
Looks like Sue Dibny, but the body is so burnt it could be Batman or Captain America even.

Hell, anybody seen Snapper Carr in a while? Might be be him. Better get NCIS Forensics on
the line. Tell Abby to get her cute butt down here and be sure to check for alien DNA .
It might be J'onn Jonzz or god help us Superman again.

Now Dan has explained to us that all these recent deaths are part of one big story they
are telling. One that leads from Final Crisis to the Blackest Night, and all the carnage is just
about telling the best stories they can.

But a funny thing happen on the way to the morgue, I the reader and no doubt
a lot of the audience stopped giving a damn. Oh, you killed Batman?
When's he coming back? How long you keeping him dead?
6 Months? A year? How long has Captain America been pushing up daisies
let's use that as a guide.

I just recently found out that Lana Lang might be dead now or at least soon to be dead.
My reaction. Who cares?

Wait, just a God damn minute. Lana Lang is dead?

Superman's first girlfriend is dead? Why this is outrageous!

Unbelievable. I can't imagine such a thing.

Yet, my real reaction. Jaded indifference.

This should not be. But it is.

And then I get to "Kill Lady Blackhawk."

and what's the next item on the list, that someone thought would be funny to hammer
home just how much they don't give a shit about this character.

Get Coffee.

Because they know that some fanboy somewhere will get so wound up about
these 3 words that he'll waste an entire evening writing an angry blog
about it and then post it on the internet. Just to make himself feel better.

And well, like they say any press is good press...

As long as they are talking about us.....

I don't know who I hate more?

Them or Me.

Well actually I do.

Comments

[Duskdog]

Lady Blackhawk? NOOOOOOOO!

It's like every single character that I ever really loved is dead. Except for Guy Gardner. If they kill Guy, I have almost nothing left in the DCU.... I mean, there are lots of characters that I like a lot, but the ones that I really love, that keep me coming back month after month, have slowly been killed off. The Dibnys, Ted Kord, several titles that I read (Birds of Prey and Blue Beetle among them), and now Lady Blackhawk, too?

I don't understand why. She's a strong woman, she's fun, she's funny, she's capable... oh yeah, that's probably why.

Damn it, Lady B. Sleeping with Hal was your downfall. You'll probably die from whatever STD he gave you.

[Mike Wendler]

we're in the same boat Duskdog, I died a little inside when they canceled Birds of Prey. And killed Sue Dibny. and then Ralph. and then... well you get my point.